Sunday, 19 April 2015
I Solve Most Of My Problems
I was chatting on the phone to a friend (one of my best) this weekend, and she was telling me how she'd failed in a situation she was describing involving the unexpected arrival of a More-Than-Annoying-Person.
"Did you lose it?" I asked. "Did you run around screaming? No? Under the circumstances, you did well not to break the law."
The problem is, we concluded at the end of laughing, that we both routinely set ourselves standards which are not only unattainable, but also unnecessary.
According to Wikipedia, a source I can now (having resolved to lower my standards) consult without shame, perfectionism is a personality trait characterised by a person's striving for flawlessness and setting excessively high performance standards, accompanied by overly critical self-evaluations and .... [yawn]. The next sentence says something about unattainable ideals. Well stuff that.
"So," I said to my friend, with the conviction unique to hypocrisy, "your standards are far too high. Lower them. If, say, your benchmark was in this instance, 'Deal With Annoying Person Whilst Avoiding Criminal Activity', you'd have reached it with, dare I say it, room to spare. Instead of feeling like a failure, you should be proud of yourself." She had to agree.
Taking my own advice, I am spending this evening with a glass of wine, busily lowering my standards all round.